View Full Version : The Great Troll Cookbook

28/Mar/2016, 03:08 AM
Source (https://atolkienistperspective.files.wordpress.com/2013/08/trollshaws.jpg)

"Mutton yesterday, mutton today, and blimey, if it don't look like mutton again tomorrow," said one of the trolls.
"Never a blinking bit of manflesh have we had for long enough," said a second. "What the 'ell William was a-thinkin' of to bring us into these parts at all, beats me - and the drink runnin' short, what's more," he said jogging the elbow of William, who was taking a pull at his jug.
William choked. "Shut yer mouth!" he said as soon as he could. "Yer can't expect folk to stop here for ever just to be et by you and Bert. You've et a village and a half between yer, since we come down from the mountains. How much more d'yer want? And time's been up our way, when yer'd have said 'thank yer Bill' for a nice bit o' fat valley mutton like what this is." He took a big bite off a sheep's leg he was toasting, and wiped his lips on his sleeve."

The Hobbit , Roast Mutton

There are many books in the Library of Master Elrond of Rivendell. In Minas Tirith, the accumulated knowledge of their history is unparalleled by the race of Men. The Tower of Orthanc, too, holds an impressive array of wisdom.

Yet not one of these libraries has a Troll Cookbook.

It is a sad indictment of the exclusionary society we live in that Troll Cookbooks are not accepted into other cultures.

Here in the Lone Lands, however, we try our best to make everyone feel accepted. Which is exactly why the Bill Foods and Entertainment Company decided to publish a Troll Cookbook.

The Great Troll Cookbook is edited and published by none other than Bill the Troll (who discovered that he has a lot of free time since he became a stone). The book is meant for [the cooking of] elves, Dwarves, goblins, men, and hobbits. Trolls, of course, cannot read, but can understand the broader meaning of "hobbit in pot with salt and elf ears".

Here you may post recipes for all kinds of entertaining, amusing, exciting, and interesting foods.
You can post either in or out of character.
Keep everything Troll-Friendly Family-Friendly!
You may double post if one week had passed!
You may post pictures or drawings of the foods.
Have fun!
For creativity and good quality, you will be rewarded.

Thread idea and inspiration: The Troll Cookbook (http://www.lotrplaza.com/archives/index.php?Archive=Second%20Age&TID=213780)